I’m on the campus of UCSB this week at family camp, and it's inspired me to blog about what students should learn in order to prepare for the real world after graduation. This is an opportune time to broach this subject because the school year is about to begin, and careers can still be affected.
First, take this little test about the state of your understanding of the real world right after you graduated from school.
首先，做个小测验，看看你对刚从学校毕业所步入的真实世界的理解是怎样的。（略）
Compare your answers to what you learned after a few years in the workforce. It seems to me that schools often teach the opposite of what's necessary for the real world. Perhaps in school people have plenty of time and no money, so long papers, emails, and presentations are not a problem. However, people in the real world have plenty of money (or at least more money) and no time. This is a list of what I wished I learned in school before I graduated.
How to talk to your boss. In college, you’re supposed to bring problems to your teachers during office hours, and you share the experience of coming up with a solution. In the real world, you’re supposed to bring solutions to your boss in an email, in the hall, or in a five-minute conversation. Typically, your boss either already knows about the problem or doesn’t want to know about it. Your role is to provide answers, not questions. Believe it or not, but in the real world, those who can do, do. Those who can’t do, share with others who can’t do. 如何与你的上司交谈。在学校里，你被告知要在答疑时间带着问题去见你的老师，你将享受到一份得到解答的经历。但在现实世界中，你则要将解答带给你的上司，通过邮件，在门厅里，或是一次五分钟的交谈。典型的例子是，你的上司或者已经知道问题所在或者根本不想知道关于它的任何事情。你的角色是提供解答，而不是问题。不管你是否相信，但在现实世界中，会解决问题的，解决问题。而那些不会解决问题的，只能和不会的人一起不会。
How to survive a meeting that’s poorly run. Unfortunately, it could be a while before you run meetings. Until then, you’ll be a hapless victim of them, so adopt these three practices to survive. First, assume that most of what you’ll hear is pure, petty, ass-covering bull shiitake, and it’s part of the game. This will prevent you from going crazy. Second, focus on what you want to accomplish in the meeting and ignore everything else. Once you get what you want, take yourself “out of your body,” sit back, and enjoy the show. Third, vow to yourself that someday you’ll start a company, and your meetings won’t work like this. 如何熬过组织不善的会议。很不幸，在你自己能主导会议之前，还有一段时间。在那之前，你将是一个不幸的祭品，所以不妨试试以下三个小技巧。第一，把大部分你将听到的当作是纯粹的、琐屑的、ass-covering bull shiitake，它只是游戏的一部分。这将避免你抓狂。第二，集中注意力在你想要完成的事项上，其他的忽略不计。一旦你得到了你想要的，将自己置身事外，坐下，享受他人的表演。第三，发誓如果有一天你开公司，你的会议不会这样。
How to run a meeting. Hopefully, you’ll be running meetings soon. Then you need to understand that the primary purpose of a business meeting is to make a decision. It is not to share experiences or feel warm and fuzzy. With that in mind, here are five key points to learn about running a meeting: (1) Start on time even if everyone isn’t there because they will be next time; (2) Invite the fewest people possible to the meeting; (3) Set an agenda for exactly what’s going to happen at the meeting; (4) End on time so that everyone focuses on the pertinent issues; (5) Send an email to all participants that confirms decisions reviews action items. There are more power tips for running good meetings, but if you do these five, you’re ahead of 90% of the world. 如何开会。幸好，你马上就可以自己主导会议了。那么，你需要明白，开一次商业会议的主要目的是，做决策。开会的目的不是分享经历或者是让人觉得温暖和模糊。把这个记在脑子里，这里给出学会主导会议的五个关键点：（1）准时开始，哪怕不是每个人都到。因为总有下次。（2）邀请近量少的、可能来开会的人。（3）明晰议程。（4）准时结束，则每个人都能聚焦于相关的议题上。（5）给每个与会者发一封邮件，确认最终决策、回顾行动事项。还有很多更有效的关于如何开会的小技巧，但如果你做好以上五点，你将超越世界其余90%的人群。
How to figure out anything on your own. Armed with Google, PDFs of manuals, and self-reliance, force yourself to learn how to figure out just about anything on your own. There are no office hours, no teaching assistants, and study groups in the real world. Actually, the real world is one long, often lonely independent study, so get with it. Here’s a question to test your research prowess. How do you update the calendar in a Motorola Q phone with appointments stored in Now-Up-To-Date? (I’ll send a copy of The Art of the Start to the first person with a good answer.) 如何独自找出头绪。用Google, PDF格式的手册，以及自我依靠来武装自己，并驱使你学会如何独自找到头绪。现实世界中，没有答疑时间，没有助教，没有学习小组。事实上，现实世界是一个漫长，而且常常是寂寞的、独自学习，你必须习惯它。这里有个问题来测试一下你的研究能力。你如何更新摩托罗拉Q型手机里的约会日程？
How to negotiate. Don’t believe what you see in reality television shows about negotiation and teamwork. They’re all bull shiitake. The only method that works in the real world involves five steps: (1) Prepare for the negotiation by knowing your facts; (2) Figure out what you really want; (3) Figure out what you don’t care about; (4) Figure out what the other party really wants (per Kai); and (5) Create a win-win outcome to ensure that everyone is happy. You’ll be a negotiating maven if you do this. 如何谈判。不要相信你在电视节目中看到的谈判和团队合作。那些都是狗屎。在现实世界中行之有效的唯一方法包括五个步骤：（1）弄清状况。（2）指出你真正想要的。（3）指出你不想要的。（4）指出对方真正想要的。（5）创造一个双赢的结果，保证每个人都欣然接受。掌握了这些要领，你将成为一个谈判高手。
How to have a conversation. Generally, “Whassup?” doesn’t work in the real world. Generally, “What do you do?” unleashes a response that leads to a good conversation (hence the recommendation below). Generally, if you listen more than you talk, you will (ironically) be considered not only a good conversationalist but also smart. Yes, life is mysterious sometimes. 如何与人交谈。一般的，“怎么了？”将不会起作用；一般的，“你在做什么？”将不会引出一段好的谈话；一般的，如果你听的比说的多，你将被人（挖苦地）认为不仅是一个好的谈话者，而且很聪明。是的，生活有时就是这么神秘。
How to explain something in thirty seconds. Unfortunately, many schools don’t have elevators or else students would know how to explain things in a thirty-second elevator pitch. Think mantra (three words), not mission statements (sixty words). Think time, not money, is the most important commodity. Think ahead, not on your feet. At the end of your thirty-second spiel, there should be an obvious answer to the question, “ So what?” If you can’t explain enough in thirty seconds to incite interest, you’re going to have a long, boring career. 如何在三十妙内解释一件东西。不幸的，许多学校并没有升降机或是其他，可供学生（有机会）从中知晓如何在乘升降机的三十秒内解释一件东西。想想曼陀罗（mantra，三个词），而不是使命的陈述（60个词）。想想时间（30妙）才是最重要的商品，而不是金钱。往前想，而不是站在原地。在你三十秒的滔滔不绝最后，当面对问题“然后又如何呢？”，你必须有显然的答案。如果你不能在三十秒内解释的足够清楚以引起兴趣，你将有很长、无聊的职业生涯要走。
How to write a one-page report. I remember struggling to meet the minimum page requirements of reports in college. Double spacing and 14 point Selectric typewriter balls saved me. Then I went out into the real world, and encountered bosses who wanted a one-page report. What the heck??? The best reports in the real world are one page or less. (The same thing is true of resumes, but that’s another, more controversial topic for unemployed people who want to list all the .Net classes that they took.) 如何写一页纸的报告。我还记得在我读大学期间，为了满足最小页数要求而苦苦挣扎的日子。双倍行距以及14号字体救了我。后来我走出校园步入社会，却遇到我的老板们，只要我写一页的报告。“搞什么？！”在现实世界最好的报告是一页纸或者更少。（同样的情况也适用于简历，但那是另一个更惹人议论的话题，特别是对那些企图将所有上过的网络课程列出的待业者。）
How to write a five-sentence email. Young people have an advantage over older people in this area because older people (like me) were taught to write letters that were printed on paper, signed, stuck in an envelope, and mailed. Writing a short email was a new experience for them. Young people, by contrast are used to IMing and chatting. If anything, they’re too skilled on brevity, but it’s easier to teach someone how to write a long message than a short one. Whether UR young or old, the point is that the optimal length of an email message is five sentences. All you should do is explain who you are, what you want, why you should get it, and when you need it by. 如何写五句话的邮件。年轻人在这方面有优势，因为年纪大的（像我）被从小教育写实体信，印在纸上，签名，粘在信封里，然后邮寄。写一封简短的电子邮件对他们而言是一个全新的体验。年轻人则相反，他们习惯于即时通信和网上聊天。如果有任何（可能有问题的）事，他们太擅长于简短，但教人写长可比写短容易多了。不管你是年轻还是年老的，问题的关键在于，写电子邮件的最佳长度是五句话。所有你该做的是，解释你是谁，你想要什么，你为什么要，以及什么时候。
How to get along with co-workers. Success in school is mostly determined by individual accomplishments: grades, test scores, projects, whatever. Few activities are group efforts. Then you go out in the real world the higher you rise in an organization, the less important your individual accomplishments are. What becomes more and more important is the ability to work with/through/besides and sometimes around others. The most important lesson to learn: Share the credit with others because a rising tide floats all boats. 如何与协作者共事。学校里的成功多半取决于个人的成就：等级、考试成绩、项目等等。极少的活动是靠团队合作的。然后你步入现实世界，你在组织中爬的越高，个人成就的重要性就越低。日益重要的是与人共事、靠人做事、帮人做事、甚至有时围绕他人做事的能力。要学的最重要的一课是：学会与人分享信任，因为水涨船船高。
What about freeloaders? (Those scum of the earth that don’t do anything for the group.) In school you can let them know how you truly feel. You can’t in the real world because bozos have a way of rising to the top of many organizations, and bozos seek revenge. The best solution is to bite your tongue, tolerate them, and try to never have them on the team again, but there’s little upside in criticizing them. 那么那些搭便车的人呢？在学校里，你可以让他们知道你有多讨厌他们。但在现实世界中你不能这样，因为那些蠢蛋有办法爬到组织的高位，而他们会寻求报复。最好的解决办法是，咬紧舌头，忍受他们，然后试着再也不要和他们共事，但指责他们的正面意义不大。
How to use PowerPoint. I’ve seen the PowerPoint slides of professors—it’s no wonder that most people can’t use PowerPoint to sell hybrid cars when gas is $10/gallon. Maybe professors are thinking: “This is a one-hour class, I can cover one slide per minute, so I need sixty slides. Oh, and I’ve written all this text already in my textbook, so I’ll just copy and paste my twelve-point manuscript into the presentation.” Perhaps the tenure system causes this kind of problem. In the real world, this is no tenure so you need to limit yourself to ten slides, twenty minutes, and a thirty-point font—assuming that you want to get what you want. 如何使用PowerPoint.我看过教授的PPT幻灯片——难怪当天然气价格达到每加仑10美元时，大部分人不能用PPT来卖混合动力型汽车。也许教授们想：“这是一个小时的课程，我可以在每张幻灯片上花一分钟，所以我需要60张幻灯片。Oh, 我已经把这个写进我的讲义了，所以我只要复制粘帖我的12点手稿到这个演示文档就可以了。”也许是终身聘任制（译者注：美国教授一旦拿到tenure，即成为终身教授，衣食无忧。用以保障教授能专心治学）引发了这样的问题。在现实世界中，没有终身的铁饭碗，所以你需要将你限制在10个幻灯片，20分钟，和30码的字体上——假设你希望得到你想要的。
How to leave a voicemail. Very few people of any age leave good voicemails. The purpose of a voicemail is to make progress towards along a continuum whose end is getting what you want. A long voicemail isn’t going to zip you along to the end point of this decision. A good model is to think of a voicemail as an oral version of a compelling five-sentence email; the optimal length of a voicemail is fifteen seconds. 如何留语音邮件。不管什么年纪，极少人懂得如何留好的语音邮件。××。一个好的模型是把语音邮件当成语音版的压缩式五句话电子邮件；语音邮件的最佳长度是15妙。
Two power tips: First, slowly say your telephone number once at the beginning of your message and again at the end. You don’t want to make people playback your message to get your phone number, and if either of you are using Cingular, you may not hear all the digits. Second (and this applies to email too), always make progress. Never leave a voicemail or send an email that says, “Call me back, and I’ll tell you what time we can meet.” Just say, “Tuesday, 10:00 am, at your office.” 两个有效的小技巧：第一，在留言的开头和结尾慢速的说出你的电话号码各一次。你不想让人回放留言来获得你的电话号码，而且如果你们当中任何一个使用Cingular，你将不会听到所有（开头）的数字。第二（这个也适用于电子邮件），永远取得进展。永远不要留言或写邮件，说：“回头联系我，我会告诉你我们什么时候可以见面。”直接说：“周二，上午10点，在你的办公室。”
One last thing: the purpose of going to school is not to prepare for working but to prepare for living. Working is a part of living, and it requires these kinds of skills no matter what career you pursue. However, there is much more to life than work, so study what you love. 最后一点：上学的目的，不是为工作做准备，而是为了生命。工作只是生活的一部分，它需要这些技能，不管你未来的职业如何。然而，生命还有更多的东西，所以学习你所热爱的。
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